I need to take more control.
One of my greatest qualities is my organizational skills, but I haven’t really implemented that into this book club we’ve got going on. We’re pretty much just winging it at every meeting. We touch on the book, but most of the conversation is really not about the book at all. I’d like to guide the discussion a bit more.
One of my lesser qualities is my difficulty in remembering plot points. I mentioned at our last meeting, when asked about my favorite book character, that I don’t store books in my mind. I have a diffucult time remembering authors and storylines of books that I’ve read. As a Lit major, I read a lot in college, and I developed the habit of purging a book from my mind after I was done with it. That is especially true of books I read quickly (which is every book that I really enjoy).
So I made it a point to write questions as I was reading our current book, Queenie. I read it in just over two days because it was really entertaining and flowed easily. I decided that I need to go into our next meeting prepared with questions to lead the group discussion. I’ve never been much of a discussion leader, I’m more of a listener, but this is a great group to practice these skills with.
I am really enjoying this book club, and I hope to grow it once we get the kinks sorted out. I need to develop a better method for choosing books with the group, and I think using the polls feature in our group chat (that was also implemented at the last meeting) will facilitate book selections.
I’ll let you know how we all liked (or not) Queenie after our next meeting at the end of the month. In the meantime I’m still reading through Octavia’s Brood. I’m not rushing through this one, I’m enjoying it slowly, but I’ll let you know when I’m done.
Until next time,
Okay, I know you’ve been waiting for me to talk about Kathleen Collins’ Notes from a Black Woman’s Diary.
We’ve officially rescheduled our book club meeting for this week Thursday. If all goes well, I’ll be giving you guys and gals my thoughts next week Monday. Fingers crossed.
In the meantime, let me know what you’re currently reading.
4. Write a letter from one of your characters to another
I can’t believe how suddenly you showed up in my life. It was so easy to let my guard down. This is not a break-up letter, so don’t worry. When I was at my lowest point you came through for me. Yours was the only hand that reached down into my darkness when my best friend died and the sun went away. I never would’ve expected you to catch me so effortlessly when I was falling so hard. Especially not after a couple of dates. You are the type of man fairy tales are written about. You are beautiful and charming and smart and strong and safe. You are safe. You are safe and that scares me because I’ve never felt safe before. I grew up not knowing what safe was. The only one I could count on was Dais and now that she’s gone….I know you are the kind of man I could really let myself love. You’ve already caught me once, so I know it’s okay to fall for you. If this were a movie I’d be expecting the worst right now. You have some wife hiding in another city, or you’re actually a serial killer, or your brother is actually your son, or you’re a rival trying to steal my business, or you’re one of my father’s cronies trying to…I don’t even know what he’d be trying to do. Honestly, any of that could actually be true because we don’t really know each other. What you’ve shown me could all be an act. Only time will tell. Even Bundy had someone he loved, you know? My intuition is usually pretty solid, which is why I’m in the business I’m in, and there are no sirens when it comes to you. I don’t see red flags or warning signs. All I see are green eyes, compassion, and strength when I look at you. You over analyze things which means you’re always prepared. Even for me, as rough as I can be. I know I’m not easy. I’ve had difficult things in my life. You are not a difficult thing. You are what makes me want to let go of difficult things. You make me see light. You make me feel more than hurt and frustration. You didn’t bring a bulldozer and try to break down my walls, you power washed them first. You hosed down all the gritty nasty stuff that I was projecting, then you started climbing that wall instead of hammering at it. Okay, that’s a really bad analogy, I know. But you get what I’m saying right? Thank you for showing me how to be cared for instead of trying to break into my heart. I think I love you. Or, at least, I’m starting to.